I don't know about you, but I feel like singleness is an underrated gift that life gives us.
Singleness is the ultimate time for self-care, self-discovery, self-love and self-development. But why do I feel like we never talk about its benefits as a society? Why do we push young people into relationships without stressing the importance of a relationship within themselves?
I think the relationship we have with ourselves is just as important as the relationship we have with others. I think it's even more important. Yes, we will live within ourselves for the rest of our lives, thus we will have plenty of time to figure out who we are, but why not do it sooner than later? Why do we rush to get in relationships with people when we are in a rocky relationship within ourselves? Shouldn't we want to smooth things out within ourselves first?
I've been single all my life, and l think it all worked out for the better. Imagining finding myself and finding my perfect someone simultaneously stresses me out immensely.
I also think I would have struggled a lot more with finding myself if I threw another person in the loop. Knowing myself, I would have gotten lost in who I am becoming and who my partner needs me to be. That battle alone would confuse me into oblivion.
I think the battle that we sometimes go through dating in the years we are developing could be prevented if we were just told, “You don't have to date right now, nor are you probably ready. Date when you feel like you know what you want, or at least know who you are.”
It's OK to not want to have to balance your time between yourself, work, a partner and whatever else you may have going on. It's OK to figure out who you are by yourself.
In fact, I think it's better to.